Thursday, January 15, 2015

So...About That Last Post.

Let me just take a big ol' gulp of humility here. It's hard to swallow. I stand corrected. Not completely, because I still maintain my position that Triston was labeled. However, I got a call from the principal.

So, the school district allows the use of iPads. I really don't like this because I think it's not as monitored as it should be. As in, my kid has told me they've been able to search inappropriate things. But, I think it can be a great academic tool as well, so what do you do? Make him the weird kid that can't use the iPad?

Triston has been saying all year that some of the teachers freak out and yell at the kids and talk really mean to them. I know this is true, at least in part, because I've seen it myself while there. But, you know, 5th graders exaggerate, like, everything, so I just listen and say I'm sorry you have to listen to that, which usually warrants a response like, "NO! Mom, you wouldn't believe it, you have to hear it!" And when it has to do directly with him I usually  just say, "Well, you shouldn't have _______" You have to follow the rules.

And then he discovered the video app on the ipad. 

The principal said he had multiple videos of teachers during class time Of course, without their permission - he was being sneaky. I asked Triston and sure enough: he was trying to capture one of them yelling at a student. I'm not even sure what to do with this info, but one thing's for sure: no more 20/20 or dateline. (Har. But, seriously.)

And then...his teacher called me today.

He's been having problems with respect. Shocker. Like, actually rolling his eyes and sticking out his tongue at the teacher. Who does that?! Uhhhh....that'd be my kid.

I know Triston is a great kid. He is helpful and funny. He is the first one to offer a compliment or offer to play with Nash or hold Emma. He thinks about the needs of others including the less fortunate. He cares about his grades and wants to do the right thing. He is a hard and reliable worker. When he messes up, HE comes to US and says he wants to do better, so, I just do not understand WHY he is having so many problems at school.

(And side note: As I'm talking to the teacher, Nash put bread in Emma's mouth. I saw her making a sucking face and thought, "uhhh, what is that? And then I pulled out...bread. In her mouth. And she smiled really big and looked at me like, "oh look, I'm just a big girl....eating bread.")

Oh, I should talk about Nash. In the last few months my angel baby has turned into I don't even know what. Let me give you an example: at a church function a few weeks back, I was trying to get the projector to work with my computer and it wasn't projecting the image. I said to myself, but loud enough for people to hear, "why isn't this working?!" and Nash cups his hands and shouts out "Because you're dumb" in a sing song tone. Like, he was an actual heckler. AND THEN when I was talking to the entire primary and said Heavenly Father loves each of you, he says "Heavenly Father hates you". Other examples include screaming loudly and kicking his legs when we are trying to leave the library or telling people he's going to hurt them because they are doing something he doesn't like, or refusing to clean up his mess and omg, the baby talk. He'll start talking like a baby sometimes when he is unhappy and I can't stand it. I mean, the list could go on here. Think 3 year the extreme?

Ummm...I'm sort of having a crisis here. I've got two kids that can't get the rules right, right now. 10 and 3. Hard ages with plenty of time to figure it out but holy crap, in my mind I'm envisioning them incarcerated or homeless because they just can't follow the rules.  And light bulb: they are the most similar in personality.

So, what do you do?

I *think* you just have to love them through it. Right? Give them more. Not of stuff,  but of yourself and things to do. Helping and serving alongside them and showing them and REMINDING them that they can make a difference. What THEY do matters. (please tell me I'm right?)


It's hard to envision giving more when you already feel like you're in the hole. But, I know nothing is impossible, especially when you start praying, like, really hard. We can do this.

I'm eager to see how this goes.


Andrea said...

I'm thinking maybe your son is acting out because of his teacher's negative behavior towards him. Kids feed off of others attitudes.. (Still trying to beat this one in my husband's head).. I would of loved to see those videos on that iPad. My first thought was hmm is there something to hide? Did he capture the true colors of this teacher?.. I could go on and on about labeling kids but i won't lol.. I'll help you by praying some extra prayers that things get better.. Hang in there

Jen said...

Thank you! It has gotten better!

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